In a locked, sealed and heavily guarded room deep in the bowels of the White House, newly elected President for Life Barack Obama lays out the future to Co-Vice Presidents for Life Bill Clinton and Elizabeth Hurley.

“I love my golf,” Obama laughed,
“It’s such a simple game
No need for booty or for graft
Like others I could name.”
“Speaking of booty,” Clinton smiled
I hope that you don’t mind
My co vice prez is kinda wild
Ah see our stars aligned
So if you could, bro, make it short
We share  your point of view
So you can hold down this here fort
While we say toodle-oo.”
Obama said, “I feel your pain
The future it looks bright
And so until we meet again
Let’s all just say goodnight.
We’ll meet again in this sealed room
And count the circled suns
Our blue state friends are wrapped in gloom
Them red states all have guns.”