I spoke to my good friend Barack Hussein Obama the other day, and he seemed troubled. He said his love life was in ruins, and I said Michelle? He said no, Vladimir.

Our love is gone, it’s hit the skids
He said with tear dimmed eye
And if it weren’t for the kids
I’d kiss the man goodbye
Count all the times over I’ve bent
When we both shared our love
How much to me our friendship meant
And then he slew the dove
The snow white dove, the sign of peace
He ran off with Ukraine
I cried and begged him please to cease
My pleadings were in vain
With narrowed eyes I clenched my fists
Cried Putin is to blame
He sneered and through my tear dimmed mists
Screamed Stalin was his name