2b Or Not 2b

The president of the United States has many decisions to make, and President Obama seems entirely reluctant to make them. Which is why he insists on leading from behind. That way he won’t have to make the call, and thus is able to absolve himself from blame when things go wrong, as they so often do. And so the White House undoubtedly has a plan for Syria or Lebanon or Iran or the Chinese or any of the other threats to the security interests of the United States, but when it comes time to implement one of them, it turns out there is no plan because no one can decide which one it should be. If it isn’t Plan 1a, or 1b, or maybe even 2a, then it must be Plan 2b, right?  The following is a transcript of Obama demanding the Cabinet come up with options. Obama, as Hitler was fond of saying, goes about his business with all the assurance of a sleepwalker.


2b or not 2b, that is the question

Or maybe there are questions not to ask

To act at all could surely bring disaster

Why set a man to do a hopeless task

1a was much too risky in the long run

1b had flaws that made us wince with pain

2a was little better but was simpler

2b just takes us back to 1 again

And so I shall announce my firm decision

3a it is and that’s my final word

So I’ll expect to see 3a tomorrow

And everyone involved of course be heard

You guys and gals at State, Defense and Homeland

Submit in detail what you think we need

And Commerce, Labor, Energy and Housing

Will do the same of course with all due speed

You guys at Goldman Sachs will put your oar in

You Google guys and gals will data mine

And Axelrod and guys will do some polling

And have it on my desk by half past nine

This being president is all so stressful

No time to exercise or sleep or talk

A good thing I have found the right solution

I get my sleep and at the same time walk