Tag Archives: campaign treasurers

Campaign Treasure

A Democratic campaign treasurer named Kinde Durkee has apparently “lost” huge sums of money belonging to a very large number of Democratic politicians. Senator Diane Feinstein has discovered that her campaign war chest that once held 5 million dollars is now empty, and others have lost lesser, but still significant, amounts. The question is whether Ms Durkee stole the money or simply laundered it, and it isn’t lost or stolen at all, but simply placed in a less open file drawer. Think about it. If you receive illegal campaign contributions, from China or Iran for instance, what better way of cleaning it up than call the cops and say it was stolen? You still have the illegal money, but on the other hand, legally, you don’t have it. Pretty neat. A very wealthy friend, who began life as a poor but honest campaign treasurer, explained how the campaign treasurer business works.



You see, he said, you have this stash

That came from who knows where

Just bags and bags of dirty cash

That you just can’t declare

So what you do is turn it to

Somebody such as me

Who will all traces burn for you

For just a placement fee

That way the dough is yours to spend

In any way you please

It’s clean and most pols now depend

On how I do the squeeze

I see, I said, a laundryman

Campaign check s from abroad

And now there is no quandary, man

Explaining how King Saud

Could send a check to Ms Feinstein

To help her keep her seat

And maintain that no drilling line

That keeps the Saudi teat

Just flowing high priced oil to us

While we refuse to drill

I understand there’s little fuss

But all that in the till

Must tempt you just to take a bit

Of all that ready cash

It does, he smiled, his face bright lit

That’s how I got my stash

I’m rich beyond my wildest dreams

And best of all I’m free

For politics is full of schemes

And schemers just like me


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