Have you ever noticed that tin pot dictators throughout the world invariably wear Rolex watches? Have you ever noticed that they style themselves as men of the people, yet they live in mansions, are surrounded by beautiful women, and drink the finest wine and wear designer clothes? Wonder no longer. It is all part of the winning persona. No oppressed and depressed peon wants to be ruled by someone just like himself. You wear a Rolex watch and you are idolized by the world’s left wing press. Wear a Timex, like George W. Bush, and the world’s left wing press snickers and sneers. I spoke to a tin pot dictator recently, a man who wore a Timex, and he explained what happened.

I wear my heart outside my sleeves

I speak of that which man believes

I look the part of common man

Coiffed hair, clipped nails, a winter tan

My women elegant and slim

Masseurs and workouts at the gym

My speeches ring eternal truths

My words bring voters to the booths

My smile bedazzles womankind

My motorcades pass streets full lined

And yet the Left won’t budge a notch

My sin, I wear a Timex watch