President Obama, reflecting on the radiance of his argent being, describes, in all humility, what he would see in the mirror if he were someone or something else.

If I were a pol I would be like the Borgias

If I were a burger I would be a McGorgeous

If I were a king I would be a rich Saudi

If I were a dress I’d be spangled and gaudy

If I were a flower I’d be beauty but thorny

If I were Bill Clinton I’d be old but still horny

If I were a ship I would be the Titanic

If I were the iceberg it’s I who would panic

If I were a speech I’d be words bright and shiny

If I were a woods I would smell sweet and piney

If I were a mirror who sees my reflection

I’d tell him I view him with deepest affection

If I were a bird I’d fly higher than eagles

And if I were me I’d give votes to illegals

And if YOU were me you would know you are glory

And know that too soon is the end of the story