It is almost February, time for 2015 predictions, and I asked my late friend Waltradamus which of the many predictions for the coming year will come true, and he said none of them. Ever enigmatic, he ticked them off:

 Student loan crisis:

The student looks beyond the sky
Beyond the moonlit bay
To where her dreams will surely die
If not now, yesterday

Imminent Libyan ground war:

In Libya the imminent
Will surely not be found
No longer Daffy himintent
But safely underground

Saudi succession:

The mirror shows succession
Be he who lately led
As tribal high procession
Anoints the quickened dead

Deep trouble in Venezuela:

Hussein consults the wizards
Then pays no mind to words
Imparted by the gizzards
Of migratory birds

The Bill Clinton/Epstein and young girls scandal:

With Billy sex no scandal
The is is what it is
While Hillary can handle
The bubble not the fizz

Retaking Mosul from ISIS:

Like every second city
There’s always the proposal
Always the bridal pity
And at someone’s disposal

The Palestinian Authority may dissolve:

A universal solvent
Perhaps a secret bribe
A lightning strike involvement
By a fierce neighbor tribe

DC statehood:

The dream of world dominion
Two Senators! the cry
But says public opinion
Some dreams are meant to die

The Eurozone crisis:

Gods live on milk and honey
Olympus life was swell
But they’ve run out of money
And now they have to sell

Micro aggression:

A look, a word a glance is
The same as sticks and stones
Observers say the chance is
This leads to broken bones

A Russian financial default:

The gods align the savage stars
And destiny fulfills
The dreams of conquest by the Tsars
Or what the Putin wills

There you have it. The seer, the sage, has seen the future and there is nothing there.