The president of Maersk shipping lines gave a speech recently in which he said the Somali pirates are as nothing compared to the government lawyer pirates who have placed a much greater financial burden on shipping with thousands of pages of costly regulations than guys with cutlasses could ever do.

Far from the swelling ocean roar

Far from the teeming ocean shore

Behind the guarded office door

There sits a man a licensed whore

Who sees a ship and what is more

He sees the payday that’s in store

He writes the rules in lawyer lore

That forces shipping rates to soar

Bound for New York or for the Nore

Perhaps it’s pig iron for the Ruhr

He careth not for who it’s for

He careth not for at his core

He careth only for the war

He wages in the name of Gore

And proudly shows the wounds he bore

While in the pirate suit he wore