Tomb Raiders

Egyptian authorities closed the pyramids to the public when they discovered that Jews were about to capture the immense power of the pyramids by performing a sacred ceremony on November 11 at 11:11, thus using the magic numerological notation of five consecutive elevens to perform their nefarious deed. Fortunately for the world, for who knows what mischief might have ensued had the Jews succeeded in capturing the power of the pyramids, the Egyptians are not be fooled by such amateurish attempts. A relieved spokesman, a Mister al Asfar, pronounced the danger past, and all was again normal. But before one rolls one’s eyes, remember the curse called upon Carter and all who opened the tomb of Tutankhamun in 1922, the mysterious deaths of several of the archaeological party, including Carter, and the episode of the canary and the cobra, where Carter’s canary was last seen in the mouth of a cobra, a snake that was the very symbol of the Egyptian monarchy. Laugh if you will, but it is just possible the pyramids do have power, and that Tutankhamun is not just another old Giza. And as far as Carter’s canary and the cobra is concerned, it would seem the victim was just the proverbial canary in the algemeinschaft. When I spoke to al Asfar, he had much to say.



You scoff, my friend, but there are truths

Too ancient to dismiss

The power of the pyramids

Is like a Pharaoh’s kiss

A blinding flash as Amon’s fire

From Pharaoh’s lips to yours

And which is why from time to time

We must close down the tours

The Jews were come to steal the curse

The power of these stones

And use it for ignoble ends

Defiling sacred bones

But we are steps ahead of them

We know their wily ways

And now if you’ll excuse me, sir

It seems for some past days

The sky has rained down frogs and newts

And murrains by the score

And now I fear I must believe

The Jews have robbed the store


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