The European Committee for Human Rights has demanded that someone, anyone, stop Syria and Assad from killing children and innocent civilians in the ongoing Syrian civil war. Normally, this would mean the United States, but we are unlikely to step into that quagmire. Nonetheless, someone must bell the Syrian cat. The question is, who?

 

Behind the baseboard, whispering low

The mice looked to their leader

Outside now prowling in the dark

Crept silently the feeder

Upon the gentle cheese eaters

Whose shaking voices trembled

On asking of the leading mouse

Just who the cat resembled

He looks a lot like boy Assad

Said Hillary real quiet

Though contradicted by The One

Who said I just don’t buy it

I know Assad and he would not

Be treating folks so beastly

And anyway, we cannot do

A thing, except that leastly

We may encourage someone to

Alert us to the presence

Of the cruel beast who’s stalking us

And killing all us peasants

Now I propose upon the cat

We place a bell that tinkles

Whenever he shall take a step

Just one of many wrinkles

That we may take to keep us safe

In this cruel world we live in

And let me say to all my troops

That we will never give in

To threats and even dirty looks

From people who detest us

So who will volunteer to bell

The cat who vows to best us

Behind the baseboard not a sound

Came from the mice assembled

For no one, not the low or high

A hero much resembled