Monthly Archives: February 2010

The Laundrymen

Leave a reply

The Chinese claim to have developed new technology that enables them to shoot down incoming missiles in mid-air. The Chinese are now producing their own jet fighters, and energetically building a blue-water navy, complete with aircraft carriers. It has been reported that China has surpassed the United States as the number one car buying country, and we all know that everything we buy these days is made in China. Is the 21st the Chinese century? They seem to think so. Me, I’m not so sure. They have a ways to go. They, and other second and third world countries have been able to leapfrog the copper wire age and jump directly into the digital wireless age, all thanks to western technology. And there is much smug punditry about the next man on the moon will be Chinese. But there’s a lot of cultural and institutional experience they leaped over, and must be made up somehow. Right now China is driving a Maserati down a gravel road.

 

 

So the Laundrymen have conquered space

At least that’s what they say

They claim that they have won the race

The prize is to Cathay

They claim they’ll shoot our missiles down

They boast A S A T

A bank in every US town

To them A S A P

A billion people buying cars

A billion workers slave

But the road they’re on to distant stars

Still have signs for Burma Shave

 

 

Nostradamus, Guest Blogger, Vol 6

Leave a reply

With all the talk of Chinese credit bubbles and collapsing economies in Greece, it is time to put your money in a safe place by betting on Nostradamus. It is time once again for Nostradamus’s mysteriously unerring predictions about the coming sport season. For those of you who bet on line, you can put your money where your mouse is.

 

 

The Super Bowl is not for dolts

The betting’s not for those with nightly faints

The smart guys give the points and take the Colts

The smarter guys lay down and take the Saints

 

The Final Four this year includes Kentucky

While Kansas has a shot to take it all

Though Villanova or the ‘Cuse just might get lucky

Don’t put your money down on Seton Hall

 

The baseball season surely is a long one

The Phillies seem the class of senior league

The Red Sox seem this year to be the wrong one

The Phillies trump the Yanks and win it big

 

The BCS is surely not the right way

To crown the champ of college football’s year

A playoff’s what we need is what the fan’s say

The winner is – dang my Chinese crystal ball’s unclear

 

 

Who Ya Callin’ Twash?

Leave a reply

The recent Supreme Court decision in Citizens United v. FEC has ignited a firestorm of protest, not least by the President of the United States, who demanded of Congress that they pass a law overriding the decision, which they cannot do since the decision was a constitutional one. The decision opens American political campaigns to money from corporations and unions previously excluded by campaign finance reform laws such as McCain-Feingold, something the Democrats think is to their disadvantage because their union lapdogs are already deeply engaged in Democrat campaigns despite the restrictions, and this, in their view, now allows corporations to do legally what the unions have always been doing. But apart from the usual Dem/Republican take on the decision, are other interested parties now free to engage in political activity?  

 

 

An advocacy group just licked its chops

Distributing a memo

That said let’s see where this thing stops

We gotta have a demo 

Let’s find a special ‘lection wheres

We’ll spend lots of our cash

And see if anybody cares

Then folks will notice TWASH

The Rights of All Subsets of Hares

Us rabbits live here too

Now Harvey here just hates the stares

And Bugs is feeling blue

He’s subject to such vile hate speech

It’s got to stop, dagnabbit

We’ll put on ads that forcefully preach

He’s not a wascally wabbit

A show of foots and all concurred

A cry, Now let’s hop to it!

But then a tiny voice was heard

That very neatly blew it

Our acronym’s all wrong, he said

I don’t mind spending cash

But the W should be R instead

And that means we are TRASH!

They slunk away no backward glance

Turned out the lights and parted

In sorrow lost their only chance

To see what Court had started

 

 

Rule 303

Leave a reply

In Breaker Morant, Morant and Handcock are court-martialed for executing captured Boer prisoners they believed had tortured, mutilated and killed Captain Hunt, their commanding officer. At the trial, Morant was asked by what authority he killed the captured Boers, and he said, “By Rule 303,” referring to the .303 caliber of the Enfield rifle carried by the British soldiers. Rule 303 means, quite simply, he who has the guns, rules. The decision by Attorney General Eric Holder, the man who set free Puerto Rican terrorists who killed innocent Americans in a New York Central Park restaurant, to Mirandize the Christmas Day bomber who tried, but failed, to bring down an American airliner with over 300 people on board, killing them and possibly hundreds more on the ground, and try him in a civilian court with all the rights of an American citizen, has stated quite forcefully that the United States will not rule by 303, but will put the lives and safety of our citizens at risk for left wing ideological reasons. There was a time the West understood the best way to civilize those who would kill us was with a Belgian made Krag rifle.  

 

 

We need to go by wartime rules

Like rule point three oh three

The Taliban bomb children’s schools

They say girls can’t be free

Al Qaeda kills us just for fun

On camera hacked off heads

But we can’t kill them, not a one

We hand them off to Feds

Who give them lawyers who then tell

Their clients not to talk

They’ll plea with stuff they have to sell

In hopes that they will walk

Is this a way to win a war?

Oh right, it’s just a crime

And if we catch one it’s for sure

He’ll wind up doing time

Of course these days we’d surely gag

At thinking the idée

Of civilizing with a Krag

Or rule by 303

 

 

The Pied Piper

1 Reply

President Obama has vowed to press on with his dream of bankrupting the United States with trillions of dollars of debt to finance Obamacare, while at the same time destroying the economy with a massive tax on carbon, the very oil and gas that drives our way of life, a tax that will kill American business. All this while winking and nodding at Iran’s insatiable thirst for nuclear weapons to kill us all. We have three more years of the Pied Piper, and I only hope we survive his campaign of hope and change.

   

 

Obama’s people with false tears

All carp and gripe and grumble

About the long gone past eight years

As markets and jobs crumble

We get to hear of tingled legs

And Olbermann’s warped rants

While the Pied Piper himself begs

For us to join the dance

The Piper leads his children on

A mammoth spending spree

Over the cliff and we are gone

The country history

But maybe we can change the course

Not toward the cliffs he beckoned

If we can ride another horse

After November 2nd

 

 

Der Tag

Leave a reply

President Obama has placed Aegis missile cruisers and destroyers in the Persian Gulf to prevent the Israelis from attacking Iran. Are they also in place to prevent a retaliatory Israeli strike after an Iranian attack?

 

 

The day has come, the old man said

Allah has shown his hand

By now the Jewish scum are dead

The birds have left the land

Shahabs have flown, we’ve seen the trails

They headed west at dawn

With shuttered eyes one hears the wails

Of Israeli gone

No more will we be called a wog

No more the monstrous sneer

Today my son it is Der Tag

The final time is here

The Jewish entity no more

The cancer is erased

By Shahab missiles by the score

And all supremely placed

Will not the Jews return the blow

His little son replied

His father smiled and answered No

Obama’s on our side

 

 

Crusader

Leave a reply

We live in parlous times, a time of war, of the clash of civilizations. Militant Islam swept the known world from the gates of Hercules to the Hindu Kush, conquering the Christian cities of North Africa and subduing the Hindoos of northern India, establishing a Caliphate at Baghdad. The first check came in the 8th century, when a Muslim army conquered Spain, or Andalusia, and advanced into France where they were met at Poitiers and defeated by Charles Martel, Charles the Hammer. There followed centuries of warfare, with the Muslims finally being subdued at the gates of Vienna and at the battle of Lepanto, science, technology and the Western way of war gaining the upper hand. But the Muslims have never given up the dream, the command, to conquer the Infidel. Western weakness and self-loathing has given them the chance to renew their dream, and we shall shortly have need once again for the Crusader knight.

 

 

The vultures circle overhead

They wait, the man is not yet dead

The banner’d cross is seen to rest

Upon the silent figure’s chest

He stirs, he tries but cannot speak

He knows he must, but is too weak

A groan, a rising to a knee

Another groan his sword is free

A stumbled step towards grinning foe

A parried thrust, the sword held low

No shield, no helm he stood his ground

And glared the glinting saber down

He died that day for you and me

He died for us, so we’d be free

To live our lives in our own way

To live our dreams and have our say

And now the foe has come again

But do we now remember when

Brave men went out to fight and die

For God and country, hearth and sky

Or shall we meekly all submit

To Allah’s shamed unholy writ

Hell no! I hear some voices cry

So very few, just you and I

But more will come, then many fold

Will rise, and when the story’s told

The Mussulmen who ‘leashed this war

Will find what free men have in store

For those who think our courage gone

 And make of us their dhimmi pawn

The Arab thinks he is the one

His god the essence of the sun

He thinks that Allah gives him might

He thinks the kafir will not fight

But he should know we have the will

Crusader blood flows in us still

The day will come we’ve had enough

Then we will call old Allah’s bluff

And turn to glass their precious sand

In hopes they’ll finally understand

We want not war, we wish for peace

We wish only the killing cease

But if they push us to the wall

We’ll still for good the muzzein call

The vultures circle overhead

In vain, the West is not yet dead

 

 

Retreat Hell, I Just Got Here

Leave a reply

After an exhausting day trying to cram some semblance of sense into the thick skulls of the Republican scum, President Obama was in a relaxed mood as he engaged in his favorite activity, reverie. My tape recorder on, I pressed him to explain the purpose of his visit to Baltimore and the Republican retreat.

 

 

I feel relaxed, Obama smiled

My super brain just drove them wild

They sputtered and they stammered at my facts

With IQs in the lower half

To watch them squirm it was to laugh

They’d double their brain score with just two blacks

But like all white folks they just sat

And thought that this was just a chat

The president was talking just to them

It flattered them to think that I

A better speaking brighter guy

Would treat them just the same as fellow Dem

The purpose of the trip of course

Was not to ride the healthcare horse

But Baltimore was on my list to do

The crabcakes were a special treat

In truth I went there just to eat

And had some snapper with some sherry too

So now I’m pumped and on my game

Just put them white folks out to shame

I’m ready now to rumble with them cats

I’m ramming healthcare down their throats

With KSM I feel my oats

And come November squash those dirty rats

With that he drifted off to sleep

And I with missions I must keep

Left quietly and heard a gentle snore

The next room held a quiet crew

Pelosi, Reid and Biden too

I winked at them and softly closed the door