There are those who say that beauty, male and female, gives the possessor of that beauty a head start in the race of life. There are others who say that beauty and intellect are an unbeatable combination, that the possessors of beauty and intellect rule the world. And there are others who subscribe to the theory that beauty, intellect and grace in combination make the possessor godlike. Being possessed from birth of beauty, intellect and grace, I can say that those who say those things are wrong, at least in my case.
At birth the nurses squealed my name
At school the girls all swooned
My neighborhood huzzahed my fame
The crowds I drew ballooned
In high school I was head of class
Four touchdowns every game
The heart’s delight of every lass
A hero I became
In college I aced every course
A god’s four letter man
In every game I was a force
Each woman was a fan
I settled down and married well
Bright children, sweet and fair
But deep inside my life was hell
For no one seemed to care
That handsome is as handsome does
Or so the saying goes
Was handsome is as handsome was
In my case as my foes
The guys who envied me my charm
My intellect and grace
Rejoiced as I, now fallowed farm
Had lost my honored place
As handsomest in every room
As brightest of them all
And then to heighten all the gloom
My hair began to fall
As age crept in on silent feet
My paunch began to spread
By end of day now I was beat
And ready for my bed
It’s over now, the women’s cries
And adoration moans
No longer I the golden prize
Reduced to ancient bones
I sit at my computer now
And making matters worse
I spend my days watching the Dow
And writing silly verse
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